If You Open the Door, Be Ready for What Walks In

As I mentioned in my last post, Millennials/Y's love feedback. We frequently disengage from managers and from our work when we feel like what we are doing and who we are being is failing to leave an impact on others. One of the greatest lessons Gen-X and Baby Boomers can learn from the younger generation is not to wait to receive feedback. It's usually too late to make an adjustment when someone chooses to give it to you of their own volition; so step up and solicit it frequently.

At a professional association meeting last week I made it very clear that I wanted feedback on our programming, which I was now responsible for, as well as on my individual performance. I know that the association has a lot of room for growth; and while I'm a vision gal and could come up with a finely nuanced direction and probably motivate a good percentage of our members to come on board, I want to ensure that I'm giving people what they want and are paying some pretty steep dues for. This is the foundation of sustainable success.

Sure enough, a few people stepped up and let me know exactly what they were thinking. While their words might have had some extra adjectives and adverbs to soften their impact, the participants' non-verbals said it all. I'm not getting my needs met. I'm spending a lot of money. And if you don't make some changes quickly, I'm not sticking around to see what you're gestating.

As I tossed around what I had heard over quite a bit of the weekend, I realized that the beauty of feedback is that it enables you to know what the future holds if you just keep playing your game the way you have always played it. (In this case, some of our newest members will leave.) And for someone who's a recovering perfectionist, it's hard not to get my panties in a bundle when I recognize I need a miracle to have a shot at winning the game.

I have often faltered at this stage of the feedback process. I try to fix everything... yesterday... and burnout. Or I re-play the emotion I experienced while processing the message and get in my own way of producing a solution. I never question whether asking for feedback is the right choice. For me, it always is. I always prefer knowing what people are thinking so that I can self-correct. However, I want to get better at responding to feedback so that it doesn't just propel me "to do" but also "to be." For often times it's how I show up to problem solve and strategize that dictates how successful I will be and feel. So I've come up with 5 principles I want to carry with me as I continue to respond to the call to be a better leader for my association.

1. Identify more concretely where I (and those I'm leading) want to be; figure out how to assess success; and work backwards to figure out how to get there.
2. Share the game plan with others to solicit buy in.
3. Empower those who were most critical to be a part of the solution.
4. Check-in frequently to honor progress and clarify next steps.
5. Recognize that I can't give everyone what they want all of the time. But if I employ the previous steps, I can sure increase my odds!